A POINT OF CRISIS

This is a story of a little girl, perhaps four or five years old, who had experienced what one might call, her first real point of crisis.

Always distressed when her parents left home to attend some event in the big city, the little girl never quite understood why their absence had always upset her so much . . . perhaps it stemmed from a distant memory!

One evening she noticed her parents had quietly left the house, obviously in order to avoid the repeated occurrence of tears and distress. Discovering their absence, the little girl became even more distraught than usual when, in her mind, the idea dawned that they might never return. It was the first time the notion of death had surfaced in her consciousness and it shook her to the core. Withdrawing into her room, she lay on her bed in a very unhappy state and cried herself to sleep.

On the following morning, the young girl arose still with the vivid memory of yesterday vivid in her mind. She felt different and began to see everything in a different light; in place of joy, which had always bubbled in her heart, a strange shadow had settled in. It remained with her for many years, hidden in the background of her life, unseen but motivating all her thoughts, feelings and decisions from that point onward.

In her 30th year, she remembered in a flash this moment of crisis in her childhood and the way it had changed her view of the world so dramatically. In this strange and sudden recollection, she came face to face with the shadow that had lurked unseen in her troubled heart for so long and which was now exposed in the light of day as she stood alone on the top stairs outside the kitchen door overlooking a splendid view. The hidden memory had emerged with lucid clarity from the depths of her being for the purpose of resolution. She understood at once why she had chosen the life she lived and the reason for all the decisions she had made up to that point.

In her vivid recollection she recalled, as if it were yesterday, the memory of herself as a young child sitting on the front steps of the house the day after the shadow entered her life. She was innocent and vulnerable at the time, but became lost in thoughts of a life-changing nature on that fateful day. She remembered the shadow whispering in her young heart that all things in this world are short-lived, that time destroys all things sooner or later and there is no escaping this reality. It revealed the foolishness of clinging to the things of this world, and to people, even those who are dearly loved. The shadow warned against desire and the hankering for all that is impermanent.

She knew in her heart it was true but felt helpless and confused. “Why would the Almighty create a world with so much beauty and people in it, only to be destroyed in the course of time?” It seemed cruel and unbearable. She waited patiently in profound silence for an answer to her question but the shadow gave no response. It remained deathly silent. There was no lifting of the heaviness from the child who was left with the profound realisation of the impermanence of life, and of the dream-like state in which everything and everyone exists. She had no understanding of what to do with this knowledge, but she knew the shadow had revealed a great Truth, even though it kept silent on what she must do about it.

The repercussions of this point of crisis and the likely after-effects it had on daily life and relationships were significant. As she grew into adulthood the event was stored in the subconscious mind, where it quietly and unknowingly dictated her life decisions and direction. It had dramatic effects on her psychological state, creating further points of crises in her life.

Some of us may regard the event as a great misfortune for the little girl, considering the psychological pain and confusion that arose in the aftermath. Others may regard the incident as a great blessing which forced the child into a particular direction. Such an awakening exposes to the inner self the vagaries of life, stimulating a desire to discover something permanent and of lasting value. She asked: If everything in the physical world is transient and short-lived, as the shadow had said, what then is eternal and truly worth giving one’s heart to while living in this world?

These were fundamental questions that needed answering. Was the point of crisis a blessing for the little girl? Her journey may have been difficult for the most part, yet it forced revelations to arise from constant probing into deeper recesses of the heart.

There are many souls in our world today who have been touched deeply by some inner crisis or another, and it is through these difficulties that we awaken from the sleep into which so many of us have fallen. ”

It is useful to recollect our own points of crises and to follow the line of inner and outer events with the cold, clear light of reason.